Safe In The Arms

Not too long ago I was waiting to pick up my son from practice. In the truck next to me were four high-schoolers passing around an iPhone. They were watching porn.

I should mention here that nothing much surprises me any more, especially in this realm, but some things sadden me to a deeper level of grief.

A few weeks ago I was sitting in the stands watching my daughter play volleyball. The seventh-grade girl sitting behind me was making plans to go see the second installation of the ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ trilogy that weekend. With her mom.

PSA: If you Google ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’ the first thing that pops up is a YouTube video; a trailer (unrated) of of all the ‘very best’ moments in the movie.

Recently in my state of Texas there was a raid and an arrest of an upper-class, middle-aged couple who had over 30,000 images of child-pornography on their computer. Most of the images were of children between the ages of six and eight.

Grief upon grief.

Some days the waves of fear, darkness, and visceral hatred threaten to wash all hope and joy away. But God’s kingdom will not be shaken. His people will not be swept away. The Good that enlivens and empowers the church will overcome evil.

The boys passing around porn in the car could use a good man in their lives. A man who will echo the whisper that God has already spoken into their precious hearts.

“What you most long for is to be naked and unashamed with someone who thinks you hung the moon…” this good man might say. “You want to to be chosen and loved by someone beautiful; someone who desires to know every part of you; someone who would rather die than ever leave you or hurt you.”

How can we help strengthen the feeble arms and weary knees of our brothers and sons as they stand alone in the rising river; a muddy river that intends to desecrate (violently disrespect) and disconnect every man in the world from his soul?

Can the older brothers, fathers, grandfathers in the church remind the young men coming behind them that a person’s deepest longing is to be known and loved by someone who will face you; embrace you; kiss you; miss you, and enjoy you for who you are?

Young men in the car. You need to know that what you most long for is for a lover’s eyes to light up when you walk in the room. You long for her to move towards you knowing she is safe and at home in your arms. A passion for porn will make this so hard.

Even as you pass around the phone, in your heart I know you hear an echo – a whisper – that you were made for more than this. That’s because there is an intimacy that the enemy would like you to know nothing about. And were you to know this love, it would, over a lifetime, make you into the very best version of yourself. Your body and soul would be at rest in the arms of another.

Porn will lead you away from this kind of pleasure. A passion for porn will make you tired and angry, selfish, and coarse. It will render you less able to welcome or respect the body and spirit of your beloved. She will no longer feel safe in your arms, and you will feel unmoored, unloved, and increasingly alone.

So look up church, and channel your fear, grief, and hatred of sin straight into the heart of God. Because even though we fear, and the water appears to be rising, there is hope for us still. The darkness will not prevail.

For you are known and loved by someone who actually did hang the moon. You have been chosen by name by someone so beautiful that there is no flaw in him. There is someone who desires to know and touch every part of you. There is a person who would rather die than ever leave you alone or hurt you.

His name is Jesus. And whether you know him now, or later, he is the Beautiful One you long for most. He is your heart’s desire. He is your hope, your help, and your promised Healer.

Jesus was desecrated (violently disconnected) from his Father so that you might be at home in the arms of God. Will you return, again and again, to his embrace?

And will we – the church – love and help those who struggle in their false passions? Will we see others as God sees them? Will our eyes light up when they walk into the room?

Will we echo the whisper that God has already spoken into every human heart?

Peace to you and yours,


6 responses to Safe In The Arms

  1. Margie Haack says:

    Well done! Winsome and attractive. I am forwarding this to some of my family – we have four grandsons who are young teens. Thanks!

  2. Given Breath says:

    Thank you Margie. Yes, it’s been something else to navigate this age of technology with our three boys. And now our daughter is on the scene and we have to work through it all with a GIRL!

  3. Connie says:

    This article expresses how much that porn has changed the way young people see themselves and others. Grown men cannot stop this addiction from destroying them or those that love them without the power of God. Youth certainly are more impressionable and do not realize how it degrades and desensitizes why sex was created. The physical act is getting so depraved and there is such little true intimacy in relationships today because Christ is not included in this union. Our children and grandchildren are going to suffer for the sins of their fathers.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Choosing to watch porn is not a sin. There is nothing wrong with being curious about sex or liking it. The problem isn’t them watching porn. The problem is when they decide to act upon those urges and commit the crime of rape. The problem is when they don’t know how to differentiate between what is okay and what isn’t and that sex is consensual.

  5. Given Breath says:

    Sexual love between a husband and wife was God’s idea.

    What God himself designed (sexual love for the purpose of procreation) can absolutely be mutually enjoyed within God’s specific boundary (one man married to one woman) and is never sin.

    Participating in the porn industry – watching porn – goes against God’s intention that both male and female have inherent dignity. Pornography reduces men, women and children to objects, which is always sinful in God’s eyes.

    Porn also reduces the watcher of it, by suggesting that real and true sexual love can be had by using (and often, abusing) other men, women, and children for their own self-gratification and sexual release.

    Men are created by God to a higher call; to lay down their lives for those they love; to protect and defend women and children – not use them for their own sexual curiosity and self-indulgence.

    Watching porn supports an industry that regularly degrades, abuses, and at the very least, encourages behaviors and attitudes contrary to God’s original design.

    I know the world believes that porn is harmless, but it’s a lie intended to blind you from ever experiencing real satisfaction and joy. This is always the tragic way of sin.

    Thanks for the note.


  6. anonymous says:

    Wow. This post is so good. It literally brought me to tears. I am a 24-year-old woman who wants a close relationship with God. I want to walk in the fullness of what God has for me. Yet I find myself time and time again returning to pornography and masturbation. I already felt that God revealed to me that the root issue has to do with feeling unloved and wanting to be known by someone, but wow, this post really hit the nail on the head. Thank you so much for sharing this.

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